My Realization

Today I realized something. In the beginning I was always happy. Everything was always going great, and it still is now.

Life was and is like this for me....
I go to school and see my friends. All of them are great and I wouldn't give them for the world. I get through each school day just fine. Then, depending on what day it is, I go to a local show near by. I get to see all my friends, from school and others I don't get to see as much. The music is ok, screamo and hardcore stuff but it's not my cup of tea. My friends like the way I dress and I usually get a complement or two. I dress like I'm from an indie/folk band. I look around and all I see are kids who dress emo/scene. I'm not labeling them, I'm just saying from first glimpse.

Now... Today I realize this...

Why am I here! Of all places! This is my home, but it doesn't feel like home. Now, I love my friends, but they are somehow nothing like me. I mean, I like being an individual, having a style all my own, but theres no one else like me around here! Why do they listen to that... that screamo music! If you listen to it because your depressed it doesn't really help. I need to surround myself with kids like me, not like these kids with their dark clothing and their depressing music!

I'm tired of this cage of a home that I live in. I need to break out of this prison. I need release from these shackles. I'm home sick for a home I never had. I need a love that has heard of the music that I have listened from and dresses differently than most. I need this world of mine to let go of me and let me live for once.